Screaming to Get Out?
One of the highlights during this time of relative physical isolation are sleepovers with my two-year-old grandson. We’ve been baking and doing projects and ‘arting’, even cleaning windows. Each activity becomes its own opportunity to experience joy through the eyes of this little child.
He typically takes naps when he stays with us. We also typically go on very long walks. With the increase in heat, that did not happen. When I went to put him into his crib for his nap after the normal ‘time for nap’ routine he let me know in no uncertain terms this was not about to happen. Screams of outrage permeated beyond his room, and actions included him hoisting his leg over the highest edge of the crib and using his arms to begin to catapult out. I recognized it would be in our mutual interest to call off the crib nap.
We opted for snuggling on an adult bed. In between relishing his little arm around my neck and the sound of his gentle breath, I found my mind wandering to the list of things I planned to do while he was napping. One by one the significance of these things faded, and I felt his little body moving up and down with his breath.
As a parent I would have somehow insisted on a nap, and most likely become quite stern about it in order to deal with my very real fear that a precedent would begin, resulting in no more naps, and well, my moments of quiet children napping time were treasured. But not with this child. Perspective shifts, to some extent with each moment.
I can’t help but think how the image of screaming and climbing out of the crib represents how many people feel, for at least moments, after many days of being asked to ‘shelter in place.’ How might our experience be different if we felt it fully, screamed about it, and then snuggled into what is? Do we express it so readily and vocally? Most likely no, and it would be helpful to just let out, assuming we can do so without seriously disrupting housemates.
As I’ve been noticing a heightened edginess since the temperatures soared here in Phoenix and escaping into the outdoors requires more planning, my home can feel like a crib that I’d like to climb out of while screaming. These children can teach us so much, including finding ways to release frustration, anger, sadness, and more. So, I explore practices to let this go, knowing this too, is temporary, and it still is an invitation to express, feel, explore and allow while recognizing the feeling of being caged in due to heat is very real. Not dwelling on it, and also not minimizing how it feels.
Aren’t we all in need of practices and disciplines that allow us to release, express, explore and connect? Whatever works for you, please take extra time to give more of it to yourself. You’ll feel better, and so will your housemates.
If you’re looking for suggestions for new ways to release frustrations, explore where you are at now, please join me for up to 4 classes each week, all drop in, all donation optional. If you want more, my Zoom door is open. Or, join me for 4 weeks to explore and develop Spiritual Mindfulness. Just be extra kind to yourself… and no screaming as you climb out a window, or a crib. ;)